Sometimes when you are feeling like you don’t know what your life is about, and you wonder what your purpose is, God will show you in the details. Sometimes when you take a second to stop and take a deep breath and look around at your life, you will see the small things that make it all worth it. The slices of your days that complete the puzzle of who you are.

At first you may see dust on the top of the refrigerator where you keep the cookie jar. But if you look closely you will see little fingerprints. Little fingerprints that will not be there forever searching for cookies.

At first you may see scraps of paper in the corner you wish someone would have put into the wastebasket. But if you look closely, you will see it is the scrawlings of an eight year old that started and erased and restarted and crumpled up and restarted a note to her nana until she got it just right.

At first you may see that someone has been in your fabric scraps and left quite a mess on the laundry room floor. But if you look closely, you may see all your five year olds Barbies having a wicked camping trip in the play tent and they each have their own little sleepingbag made from brightly colored and discarded scraps of different texture.

At first you may see that someone drug out your planner and scribbled on one of the pages where you much prefer to keep your grocery list. But if you look closely you will see that your seven year old used a highlighter pen to write #1 mom in the corner.

At first you may see just a man. Just a man you think will use you and leave you like all the rest. But if you look closely you see a man that looks at you with pure love in his eyes and kisses your kids on the forehead if he gets there after they have fallen asleep. You hear him whisper I love you to your sleeping daughters with no daddy and you know that your prayers have been answered.

I am pleased to announce to all of my readers that I am feeling much less melancholy today. I had a refreshing weekend and I am well, refreshed. On Saturday, after taking Cori and Liv to Karate, we had plans with Nana to car shop. I could have put a substantial downpayment on a new car for what I have shelled out on the rental car I have been driving for the past 2 1/2 weeks, but oh well. Who needs money when you are a single mom with three kids and a big house with electric bills the size of the national deficit? Oh yeah, that’s me.

So we shopped and shopped and shopped for a car to no avail. Nothing in my price range with less than 2 million miles on it, so as of yet I am still the proud borrower of a Chrysler Sebring, courtesy of Thrifty Car Rental.

The girls and mom and I also stopped by Borders and had hot chocolate and browsed through the books and CDs. The girls were so superbly behaved the entire day - and oh, Emma learned to swallow her ADHD medication with a drink, but for some reason it only works with soda pop. Hmm. Clever little booger isn’t she? In any regard this was a major victory as now I don’t have to cut and crush which shaves an easy 12 seconds off my morning routine. Any little bit helps. I know  that my 5 year old becoming a proficient pill popper should not be so thrilling to me, but, well, it is. And she was quite proud of herself. Even earning herself a heartfelt “Good Job Emma” from her biggest sister whom she idolizes like there is no tomorrow.

We made it home in time for an impromptu visit from my best friend Jamie and her baby, Jalynn. And I tell ya, who would wanna miss this little bundle on their doorstep?

They stayed for a little while until Jalynn could barely keep her little eyes open and then they headed home. The girls and I watched TV for a while before it was time for bed and bath. And I know I mentioned before how my middle daughter is a little quirky, but really, does any one else’s kids watch TV like this?

Man that kid cracks me up!

After the kids were tucked quietly and warmly in their beds, I flopped on the couch and sighed a deep breath. What a great, relaxing, enjoyable day. Just as I settled on some chick flick that was just coming on TV, I decided to make some hot tea and just relax and ignore the laundry taking over the playroom and the grungy bathroom floor that was calling to me to please clean it. I walked back into the living room, settled on the couch under my favorite fuzzy blanket and turned off the lamp. Suddenly I heard my front door knob turn and the door flung open. After almost simultaneously going into cardiac arrest while peeing my pants, I heard these sweet words “What I tell you bout keeping this door unlocked?” Ok so maybe the words weren’t all that sweet but the protective way he said them was very endearing. “Well, Hi Big Daddy, what a great surprise!” Then a sweet kiss right on my lips.

Ahhh, what a great day. A great day that I really needed. And by darn, I deserved it too.  

In the spirit of Valentine’s Day, which is funny for me to even say, being that for the last 27 years of my life I could not have possibly cared less about Valentine’s Day, I thought I would point out all the reasons my man is the best. Give him his props if you will. I know the “best” is a relative term, since I am sure you all think your man is the best as well, but it’s okay, we can share it. And for those of you that don’t have a man or have a man that is not the best, you may want to go away if things like this make you want to hurl, because I am going to be gushing. It will be lovey dovey and mushy and you may feel like melting. So here goes: (in no particular order of importance)

1. He is a real live Chef. He cooks ladies. And he makes this Grand Marnier Chocolate Cake that will make you wanna hurt yourself. And bacon wrapped scallops and soups that are to die for. Oh I could go on but I am starting to drool and that ’s not very attractive.

2. He has dimples. Two big ‘ole dimples in the side of his face that just make me feel all gooey when he smiles. My dad has dimples and my oldest nephew and my youngest daughter. I’m a sucker for dimples.

3. We work together with the Innercity Youth Football Collaborative of Greater Cincinnati from March until December. He puts his whole heart into these little boys and being the best mentor he can be. He loves each and every one of them and tells them every chance he gets. He requires they show him their report card and he has made more than one trip to a school to assist a child. He has fed them, helped them with homework, picked them up for practice, and made sure they know they can depend on him. This is a rough neighborhood and some of these kids have rough homes. There is no doubt in my mind he is saving lives.

4. He is charming. He oozes charm. He is the Executive Chef and Food Service Director at an upscale retirement community. Boy does he make them old ladies swoon.

5. All this week I have been sick in bed with the flu and he had to go out of town for his job. Instead of staying an extra day in a beautiful hotel on the job’s tab, which he could have, he came home and brought me a get well package. There was flu medicine, cough drops, chocolate and of course, soup.

6. He knows everything there is to know about the game of football. He can tell you every rule, every play, every position and it’s responsibilities, as well as stats and point conversions and blitzes and, and , um, other stuff. He knows it all. And he commentates during games sharing all his knowledge with me. To some of you this may sound extremely annoying, but to a true blue tomboy like myself, it is bliss. His football knowledge is super sexy.

7. He will admit when he is wrong and say I’m sorry. Amen.

8. He will sometimes call and chat on the phone with my 8 year old like they are best girlfriends. To a little girl with no daddy, this is very cool.

9. Last week I overheard a conversation he was having in the other room with my 80 year old grandmother, in which she asked him when he was gonna marry me already. He just chuckled and then told her he didn’t know, but that he knew he loved me and my kids more than he knew he could ever love someone and then he promised her he would take care of us the best he knew how. This is where I melted.

10. When my sister and her kids came home for a few days over the summer, I sat on my parents back porch and watched him throw football with my nephew when the sun was setting. The setting sun, football, and two of my absolute favorite boys in the whole world. It was one of those moments you tuck away and always remember.

11. He calls me everyday at least once just to say I love you and nothing else.

12. He tells me I am beautiful, even on days when I am near death with the flu and we both know darn good and well I look homely and horrible.

13. He loves my kids like they are his own. They’re not. Nuff said.

I could list forever and maybe someday I will. But don’t worry I won’t put you through that. But thanks for allowing me to be sentimental.

See other Thursday Thirteen Participants here.